Statement of Belief
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Screams from the Stalls
My guests have made
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Tag Archives: marriage
While it seemed like good fun, it felt more a female thing than a male thing to me so I hand-passed it to Buff who is definitely female and, rather foolishly, said I would post whatever she gave me.
Strangely Buff failed to mention the scrabble games – when we reached 2,000 games between us, we had each won over 997 games! Yes, there were several draws.
Also unmentioned are the bruises I have suffered from for years because of her violent reactions to my completely innocent and accidental puns.
And another omission is the fact that she is one of the best artists I know! In oils.
I have kept my interjections to an absolute minimum.
What are your middle names?
His middle name is Edward, mine is Anne. He is not tall, not svelte, not overtly handsome, but he’s the best man I know. He’s my sweetheart, my husband, my lover and my best friend. He takes spiders outside so I won’t kill them, he plays with our grandchildren like a child himself … he’s a mean shot with a water-pistol, he can “tweak” a cricket ball almost as well as Shane Warne although he’s not the best batsman in the world by a long shot, he likes books, books and more books, and he “smells” right. This is a peculiar asset, I know, but he has the right pheromones to attract me and make me feel good.
How long have you been together?
We first met in 1965, in my future Mother-in-law’s kitchen. I’d been to Church with his brother Peter and his best friend Les. (on whom I had a small crush … I /was/ only 19!) and this apparition stumbled into the kitchen, grunted, and went back to the bedroom. This was about 1.00 pm in the afternoon. “Who’s that?” says me. “Oh, that’s my brother John” says Peter … “Mum is a bit worried about him!”. “Oh, give him to me for about 6 weeks and I’ll soon sort him out” was my smart answer. 44 years later I’m still trying. 😉
How long did you know each other before you began dating?
If I can remember rightly, about a week.
Who asked whom out?
I’m pretty sure he asked me … it’s a long time ago! We went to a small coffee house/folk cellar in Applecross, one of the suburbs in Perth, Western Australia and we were kicked out about 1.00 am in the morning.
How old are you?
I was born in 1946 in Melbourne, Victoria, Australia and he is 18 months older than I am. He was born in Perth, Western Australia.
Whose siblings do you see the most?
Well, he sees one of his brothers every day, (not a lot of choice – I live and work with him 🙂 ) I see my sisters about once a year, although both of us have siblings who live in other parts of Australia and we rarely see them. In fact, the last time I saw my only brother and one of my sisters was when our Mother died a couple of years ago.
Which situation is hardest on you as a couple?
My disability. I suffer from a muscle wasting disease and am confined to an electric wheelchair. I am pretty high-maintenance and he was my Carer for 17 years without a break. This led to some problems and we no longer live together, although we love each other dearly and will never divorce.
Did you go to the same school?
Are you from the same home town?
No. From opposite sides of Australia, actually.
Who is smarter?
If you are talking about social issues and spelling and remembering people and telephone numbers, me … by far. If you are speaking about maths or science or computers or remembering sporting events and people, he is. By far.
Who is the most sensitive?
I think we’re pretty even … I may be more emotional outwardly but he is pretty deep and doesn’t show much emotion. We both like nature and our grandchildren and reading. We both cry at soppy movies and animals hurting.
Where do you eat out most as a couple?
We don’t very often … it’s called “Money, honey”! Or lack thereof. But when we do there’s a little restaurant right on the beach called “Ex-Tensions” which serves up a lovely meal with spectacular views of the Indian Ocean.
Where is the furthest you have traveled together as a couple?
I was going to say Singapore, but we actually spent many weeks travelling in our car with our two boys over 35 years ago and visited places like Canberra, Eden in New South Wales, Lakes Entrance in Victoria, and Melbourne. Then we came back over the Nullarbor Plain in a heat wave. On all the 10 days we were on the road we had temperatures of over 100 degrees F. This is a way bigger trip than just a short trip to Singapore!
Who has the craziest exes?
To be honest I probably do … not that it matters now. I haven’t seen any of them for 40+ years and I don’t think he has.
Who has the worst temper?
Oh, definitely me! Well, if you want a 5 foot version of Mt. Versuvius blowing her stack it’s me. But if you want a sloooooow burn culminating in the next four weeks of silence and grunts, it’s him.
Who does the most cooking?
He does. He’s a great cook and I am not too fond of it. So it works out well if he does the cooking and I do the tidying up … he doesn’t do tidying up! He has never done tidying up … in fact, he doesn’t know what tidying up is! (What is this word “Tidy” and why does it seem to be of importance?)
Who is the most stubborn?
Short and to the point … he is! I am mostly serene and malleable … he is totally stubborn, pig-headed and will not be swayed once he makes up his mind. (Ahem! I am firm, You are pig-headed!)
Who hogs the bed most?
He’s bigger than I am … and he never lets me forget it. He hogs the bed, the bedclothes, and he tries to control the TV remote. It doesn’t always work. 😉
Who does the laundry?
He does his, my Carer does mine.
Who’s better with the computer?
He is … he’s very clever with computers. He understands them … I haven’t a clue about them. I press the keys and it does “things” which result in “other things” and that’s about it as far as I’m concerned. I’m a computer Luddite and intend to stay that way. Thank you.
Who drives when you are together?
He does .. except for the one time when we went for a sailboat ride in a small catamaran and he shook with very fear! I drove that day … he did /not/ shake with very fear because I was driving! He didn’t, I tell you!!! (I was OK until the land disappeared behind us and Madagascar appeared on the horizon in front of us!)
Ok, so that is the Usness of Us.
If anyone feels so inclined, please join in the “Marriage Meme”. .
As a 1930’s husband?
I’m quite sure this is completely wrong!
There is a wifely version as well.
As a 1930s husband, I am
Found over at Dorid’s.
I re-read this old favourite for maybe the fortieth time.
Once again it reinforced a way of looking at life which has been an increasing part of me for the past four decades. How does one review a favourite child? How can one be detached when talking of ones own arm or a leg?
Yet I should at least acknowledge the power of this small volume. Some short quotations are, perhaps, the greatest compliment, for these words are within me all the time.
Fain would I take with me all that is here. But how shall I? A voice cannot carry the tongue and the lips that give it wings. Alone must it seek the ether. And alone and without his nest shall the eagle fly across the sun.
The words spoken by that tongue and those lips resonate.
Of love he said;
When love beckons to you follow him, Though his ways are hard and steep. And when his wings enfold you yield to him, Though the sword hidden among his pinions may wound you.
Of marriage he wisely opined;
Give your hearts, but not into each other’s keeping. For only the hand of Life can contain your hearts. And stand together, yet not too near together: For the pillars of the temple stand apart, And the oak tree and the cypress grow not in each other’s shadow.
Your children are not your children. They are the sons and daughters of Life’s longing for itself. They come through you but not from you, And though they are with you, yet they belong not to you.
You often say, “I would give, but only to the deserving.” The trees in your orchard say not so, nor the flocks in your pasture. They give that they may live, for to withhold is to perish.
Work is love made visible. And if you cannot work with love but only with distaste, it is better that you should leave your work and sit at the gate of the temple and take alms of those who work with joy.
Of Joy and Sorow
Your joy is your sorrow unmasked. And the selfsame well from which your laughter rises was oftentimes filled with your tears. And how else can it be? The deeper that sorrow carves into your being, the more joy you can contain.
Forget not that modesty is for a shield against the eye of the unclean. And when the unclean shall be no more, what were modesty but a fetter and a fouling of the mind? And forget not that the earth delights to feel your bare feet and the winds long to play with your hair.
Of Crime and Punishment;
Oftentimes have I heard you speak of one who commits a wrong as though he were not one of you, but a stranger unto you and an intruder upon your world. But I say that even as the holy and the righteous cannot rise beyond the highest which is in each one of you, So the wicked and the weak cannot fall lower than the lowest which is in you also.
Say not, “I have found the truth,” but rather, “I have found a truth.” Say not, “I have found the path of the soul.” Say rather, “I have met the soul walking upon my path.”
And let your best be for your friend. If he must know the ebb of your tide, let him know its flood also. For what is your friend that you should seek him with hours to kill? Seek him always with hours to live.
Of Good and Evil;
Of the good in you I can speak, but not of the evil. For what is evil but good tortured by its own hunger and thirst?
Next year, or sooner, I shall read The Prophet once more and my soul will again be refreshed.
The more they get out, the better, the study suggests
HAVE YOU HAD YOURS TODAY?
Some men should have sex every day to maximise the chances of getting their partner pregnant, researchers say.
It is known for couples with fertility problems to abstain from sex for several days to boost sperm numbers before trying to conceive.
However, the Sydney University team, addressing the American Society for Reproductive Medicine conference, said this could mean poorer quality sperm.
One UK expert said daily sex might be better for men with damaged sperm.
Dr Allan Pacey, the secretary of the British Fertility Society, said that while not having sex allowed the numbers of sperm to build up, there was a “trade-off” between quality and quantity.
HE MUST BE MARRIED
“There are men out there who think, or whose partners think, that limiting ejaculation will make them more fertile.
“I remember one couple in which the woman would only let the man ejaculate when she was in her fertile period, so the poor chap was going without for almost a month at a time.”
One day the wife and I were discussing anger management.
And I asked her, ‘When I get mad at you, you never fight back. How do you control your anger?’
She said, ‘I clean the toilet bowl.’
I asked, ‘How does that help?’
She said, ‘I use your toothbrush’