Pirates – It’s Nearly Here


THE WISH

A pirate and his parrot, were adrift in a lifeboat following a dramatic escape from a valiant battle. While rummaging through the boat’s provisions, the pirate stumbled across an old lamp. Secretly hoping that a Genie would appear, he rubbed the lamp vigorously. To the amazement of the castaways, a Genie came forth. This particular Genie, however, stated that he could only deliver one wish, not the standard three. Without giving any thought to the matter the pirate blurted out, “Make the entire ocean into rum!” The Genie clapped his hands with a deafening crash, and immediately the entire sea turned into the finest rum ever sampled by mortals. Simultaneously, the Genie vanished. Only the gentle lapping of rum on the hull broke the stillness as the two considered their circumstances. The parrot looked disgustedly at the pirate and after a tension-filled moment spoke: “Now yee’ve done it!! Now we’re gooin to have to pee in the boat.”


THE R ED SHIRT

Long ago lived a seaman named Captain Bravo. He was a manly man who showed no fear in facing his enemies. One day, while sailing the seven seas, a look-out spotted a pirate ship and the crew became frantic. Captain Bravo bellowed, ”Bring me my Red Shirt.” The First Mate quickly retrieved the captain’s red shirt and whilst wearing the bright red frock he led his men into battle and defeated the pirates. Later on that day, the look-out spotted not one, but two pirate ships. The captain again called for his red shirt and once again, though the fighting was fierce, he was victorious over the two ships. That evening, all the men sat around on the deck recounting the day’s triumphs and one of the them asked the captain, ”Sir, why do you call for your red shirt before battle? The captain replied, ”If I am wounded in the attack, the shirt will not show my blood and thus, you men will continue to fight, unafraid.” All of the men sat in silence and marveled at the courage of such a manly man as Captain Bravo. As dawn came the next morning, the look-out spotted not one, not two, but TEN pirates ships approaching from the far horizon. The crew stared at the captain and waited for his usual reply. Captain Bravo calmly shouted, ”Get me my brown pants.”

THE PIRATE AND THE SAILOR

A sailor and a pirate are drinking at a waterfront bar and they proceed to swap sea stories. The sailor notes the pirate’s peg leg, eye patch and hook. “So tell me,” asks the sailor, “how did you come to lose that leg?”  “Arrgh,” says the pirate, “‘Twas a black squall swept me overboard. Whilst in the water, a shark snapped me leg off and I’ve had this peg leg ever since.” “Wow!” says the sailor. “And how’d you get the hook?” “We was fighting at close quarters,” says the pirate. “Some scurvy dog with a cutlass hacked me hand off and I’ve had this hook ever since.” “Amazing!” says the sailor. “And what about the eye patch?” “Arrgh,” says the pirate. “‘Twas a seagull pooped in me eye.” “A seagull?” asks the sailor, a bit incredulous. “Well, I should explain,” says the pirate. “‘Twas me first day with the new hook.”

BBC Quiz of the Week


Cloud continued to increase this week although, despite the grumbling and flashing, there has been little rain on Punmu.

A mixed week. Saturday I went to our local goldmine (Telfer) looking for a consignment which has supposedly been sent there. No luck on that but I managed an excellent dinner in their mess and followed that with some golf swings and my first ever try at lawn bowls. I think I have found a new sport!

Then Wednesday saw me in the community clinic feeling quite poorly. It turns out that I have a grumbly gall bladder and infecton. So an USB port in the back of the hand so that antibiotics can be dripped in. Most uncomfortable although that will come out today. Trying to create a low fat diet is not easy!

Anyway. The results from last week. Buff scored her first crown for a while and magic hands and little fish both share the hat as they scored 2/7.

It is the most difficult quiz ever. It must be. I scored 1/7!

How will you go in this week’s BBC Quiz of the Week?

Previous Dunces

6th Nov, 2/7, magic hands, Little fish
30th Oct, 3/7,
nursemyra
23rd Oct, 0/7, Karen
16th Oct, 1/7, Cybe R. Wizard
9th Oct, 2/7, Rob, nursemyra, healingmagichands
2nd Oct, 1/7, azahar, healingmagichands
25th Sept, 1/7, Daddy Papersurfer
18th Sept, 2/7, Rob
11th Sept, 3/7, azahar, Puddock, Rob,
4th Sept, 1/7, azahar
28th Aug, 0/7, Herr G EaGle
21st Aug, 2/7, Bunk Strutts, Daddy Papersurfer
14th Aug, 2/7, azahar Puddock, sandy, daisymae81, anniegirl1138,
7th Aug, 2/7, silverstar98121, Bunk Strutts, Mrs Eagle, Cybe R. Wizard, Puddock
31st July, 1/7,silverstar98121
24th Jul, 2/7, sandy,
17th Jul, 2/7, azahar
10th Jul, 1/7, gitwizard, Mrs Eagle

Crown Winners (7/7)

17th Octember Buff
26th Octember, healing magic hands
5th Dec. Buff
9th Jan 2009, azahar
6th Feb 2009, archie
20th Feb 2009, healing magic hands
27th Feb, 2009, Buff
20th Mar, 2009, healing magic hands
3rd Apr, 2009, sledpress
17th Apr, 2009, anniegirl1138, Buff, Archie
15th May, Buff

5th June, Buff
4th July, healing magic hands

29th Aug Buff
5th Sept Buff
12th Sept Daddy P

11th Sept, nursemyra
18th Sept, Buff
25th Sept, Gitwizard
30th Oct 2009, Marty
6th Oct 2009, Buff

Peregrine Falcon Week #2


falcon2

It was 43C so a little cooling down was necessary.

falcon2a

Since no one is watching, to hell with dignity. This is fun!

God and Religion


God and Religion

burgled from I Am your God

BBC Quiz of the Week


This little quiz post is becoming my diary of the week. It is where I can make a couple of comments about how my days have been going.

This week the boss headed off for a three week break and I have been left in charge.

So not a lot of time for blogging, pre-publication is a wondrous thing. I apologise for not replying to so many comments but time is passing annoyingly fast just at the moment and at the end of the day sleep is the major need.

Gitwizard leaped into the limelight last week by scoring his first 7/7 and his first crown. Daddy P scored a dismal 1/7 and has the hat all to himself this week. It may be necessary for him to stay after school. Providing we can find an educational TG to volunteer.

This week I rebounded to a score of 5/7! How will you go in this week’s BBC Quiz of the Week?

.

Previous Dunces

25th Sept, 1/7, Daddy Papersurfer
18th Sept, 2/7, Rob
11th Sept, 3/7, azahar, Puddock, Rob,
4th Sept, 1/7, azahar
28th Aug, 0/7, Herr G EaGle
21st Aug, 2/7, Bunk Strutts, Daddy Papersurfer
14th Aug, 2/7, azahar Puddock, sandy, daisymae81, anniegirl1138,
7th Aug, 2/7, silverstar98121, Bunk Strutts, Mrs Eagle, Cybe R. Wizard, Puddock
31st July, 1/7,silverstar98121
24th Jul, 2/7, sandy,
17th Jul, 2/7, azahar
10th Jul, 1/7, gitwizard, Mrs Eagle
3rd Jul, 1/7, archie, Mrs Eagle, Karen, sandy, Rob, Bunk Strutts,
26th Jun, 2/7, Karen, sandy,


Crown Winners (7/7)

17th Octember Buff
26th Octember, healing magic hands
5th Dec. Buff
9th Jan 2009, azahar
6th Feb 2009, archie
20th Feb 2009, healing magic hands
27th Feb, 2009, Buff
20th Mar, 2009, healing magic hands
3rd Apr, 2009, sledpress
17th Apr, 2009, anniegirl1138, Buff, Archie
15th May, Buff

5th June, Buff
4th July, healing magic hands

29th Aug Buff
5th Sept Buff
12th Sept Daddy P

11th Sept, nursemyra
18th Sept, Buff
25th Sept, Gitwizard

Skywatch Friday


After a week with barely a cloud in the sky, I found that the colour of a cloudless sunset is still wondrous.

skywatch011009

International Talk Like a Pirate Day


doctor-pirate

‘Anonymous’ Declares War on Conroy


roflcon_jmm_0352_2

“Anonymous”, the international scourge of Scientology,has struck again — this time declaring war on Australia.

Hackers identifying themselves as “Anonymous” launched a denial-of-service attack Wednesday against a web site for Australian Prime Minister Kevin Rudd to protest a government proposal to filter internet content, according to the Australian Associated Press.

The hackers also targeted a web site belonging to the Australian Communications and Media Authority and planned to attack a web site for Communications Minister Stephen Conroy as well. According to a message posted by the purported hacker on a different web site, the government proposal to introduce a mandatory internet filtering plan would amount to China-like censorship.

“Not only will your rights be at stake, our internet speeds will slow down by 70 percent, be mandatory for all Aussies and will not protect us from evil AT ALL.”

The attack began at 7:00 p.m. local time and within 18 minutes the prime minister’s site was down. But it’s unclear if the site’s collapse was a result of the attack, or a defensive move by an administrator. A note posted by the hacker at 7:11 p.m. read, “we’ve confirmed on site (via a source) that the sites due to be attacked have been taken down from the coordination page, possibly before the raid.”

The Associated Press reported that more than an hour later the prime minister’s site was still down. Either way, a government spokesman said the attack was misguided since the internet filtering plan only proposed to block content such as child porn and images depicting rape and bestiality.

“The campaign that they’re mounting is erroneous and misinformed,” the spokesman said.

  • By Kim Zetter Email Author
  • September 9, 2009  |
  • This is the 87% effective Internet Filter which is controlled, not by politicians but by faceless bureaucrats. Just how far has it already gone from child pornography, bestiality and rape? Have a look at this!

Murphy’s Law


We have all heard of Murphy’s (or Sod’s) Law and we have all suffered from its effects.

Now you can determine, in advance, just how likely you are to be subject to Murphy’s Law in any task you undertake.

Simply click on the image below.

It can happen anywhere.

It can happen anywhere.

Here is my risk factor in preparing this blog post.

Factor Rating Explanation
Urgency: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 - how urgent is this task ? (9 = right away, 1 = sometime this year, maybe)
Importance: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 - how important is this task ? (9 = absolutely critical, 1 = complete waste of time)
Complexity: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 - how complex is this task ? (2 = “a child could do it”, 8 = brain surgery)
Skill: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 - what is your skill level for this ? (1 = complete klutz, 9 = expert)
Frequency: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 - how often do you have to do this ? (1 = just once, 9 = every day)

Score: 34.891
Risk Factor: 282726.9

Whew, I seem to havbyyrtr wsoppvc,,cv,dc;;p;

Thought for Today


If there is anything the nonconformist hates worse than a conformist, it’s another nonconformist who doesn’t conform to the prevailing standard of nonconformity.

~ Bill Vaughan

Vimrod and the Aliens


Then the aliens will come out of the walls and abduct you

A Second Dose of xkcd


asteroid

BBC Quiz of the Week


Not a lot happened for me this week.

The highlight? A  drive over and around the lake, into some of the country which has rarely been visited by white men. There is talk of creating a tourist trail into this area with some of the oldies telling the stories associated with the landmarks and clay pans.

And so to this week’s quiz. Last week We had sixes from azahar, The eaGle (His Grey Eminence) and Bunk. We had a record low in “Under 4/7′s” this week And Daddy P and Puddock (who is neglecting her pond in the blogipelago) were saved from the hat by Sandy’s 2/7.

How will you go in this week’s BBC News Quiz of the Week.

Me? A feeling of panic ensued as I realised I had no idea of any one of the questions. I was lucky to get 3/7.

24th Jul, 2/7, sandy,
17th Jul, 2/7, azahar
10th Jul, 1/7, gitwizard, Mrs Eagle
3rd Jul, 1/7, archie, Mrs Eagle, Karen, sandy, Rob, Bunk Strutts,
26th Jun, 2/7, Karen, sandy,
19th Jun, 1/7, azahar
12th Jun, 2/7, sandy, azahar
5th Jun, 0/7, Daddy Papersurfer
29th May, 1/7, nursemyra
22nd May, 0/7, healingmagichands
15th May, 2/7, nursemyra
8th May, 1/7, Rob, sledpress,
1st May, 2/7,Daddy Papersurfer, sandy
24th Apr, 2/7, Rob,Daddy Papersurfer, azahar , silverstar98121
17th Apr, 2/7, sandy, Rob
10th Apr, 2/7, sandy, Daddy Papersurfer, anniegirl1138, Archie

Crown Winners (7/7)

29th Aug Buff
5th Sept Buff
12th Sept Daddy P
17th Octember Buff
26th Octember, healing magic hands
5th Dec. Buff
9th Jan 2009, azahar
6th Feb 2009, archie
20th Feb 2009, healing magic hands
27th Feb, 2009, Buff
20th Mar, 2009, healing magic hands
3rd Apr, 2009, sledpress
17th Apr, 2009, anniegirl1138, Buff, Archie
15th May, Buff

5th June, Buff
4th July, healing magic hands

The Manly Blogger Guy Award


I am honoured to have been selected as one of the inaugural recipients of the “Manly Blogger Guy Award”. Thank you, DaveC from Lugubrious Drollery.

hai karate11. The blog receiving the award must demonstrate masculine qualities such as sloth, boorishness, urinary hesitancy, or flatulence. In the interest of equal opportunity, these criteria do not entirely exclude female nominees.

2. No blog which plays background music such as “Somewhere My Love” or “My Heart Will Go On” is eligible.

3. The award should be passed on to as many other blogs as possible, but watching televised sports or taking a nap should take precedence over passing out awards.

Since rain has washed out play in the third Ashes Test, I shall choose a couple of blogger guys to pass this award on to.

Metro who, singlehandedly keeps the Canadian Government in line while playing a mean game of on-line poker.

The Gitwizard who does blokey things on farms and rides bikes and takes wonderful photographs.

Bunk Strutts, with whom I rarely agree but whose right to be wrong I shall defend to the death.

Rob, who has a special tale to tell and is man enough to let his feelings show.

Daddy Papersurfer, who has introduced me to both the wonderful world of the Cliff Top Residence and to Gertrude. Perhaps this award is more for Gertrude.

Pass it on to whoever you think fit, guys. I will continue to make awards when I remember and when I find someone worthwhile.

I was going to visit all recipients and let them know that had received it but I have to practice TV watching. The sun has come out and play is about to begin at Edgebaston.

I can’t resist a pun


Especially one from xkcd

I wanted us to try finding an approximate numeric solution, but noooo.

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