A Belated Christmas Tale

With apologies to Charles Dickens

The Ghost of Prime Minister Past

And it came to pass that Scotty from Marketing lay upon his bed and worried about knives and assassinations and plottings. Eventually he fell into a troubled sleep.

In that sleep there appeared unto him a vision of a portly yet respected previous Liberal Party Prime Minister.

“I was Prime Minister just before the Second World War, ” Sir Robert said. “I sold iron to Japan and it was going to be sent back to us as exploding bombs and naval vessels. My popularity was almost non-existent and I saw I was not going to take the Nation into war with me. So I resigned and I waited out the war and then I took the Prime Ministership back and I held it for many years and many elections.”

Scotty complained, “But I don’t have a war and I don’t trust the Opposition.”

Sir Robert faded and in his fading he spoke his final wisdom. “Learn from what I said and stop destroying my Party.”

The Ghost of Prime Minister Present

It came to pass that Scotty from Marketing slept on and in his dreaming he saw himself at his desk and on his desk were memos for his actioning.

Among those memos were suggestions on how to take effective action on Climate Change to improve his standing in the electorate and he screwed them up and threw them away because he scorned science.

He said to himself in his dream that science was a worldly sin and that God would ensure his re-election.

He slept on and was at peace with himself.

The Ghost of Prime Minister Future

As he slept on and the alarm clock approached the waking time, the shade of Andrew Hastie appeared in his last dreaming.

“Oh Scott,” Hastie said. “Why did you not read those memos. Why did you dismiss science in a world which depends on science?”

“Because what you believe is more important than how many people like you.” replied Scotty from Marketing . “How many of my colleagues went on to become Prime Minister?”

“Only me, since last year.” replied Hastie’s shade.

“Well done,” smiled Scott. “You must be one of the youngest Prime Ministers in Australia’s history.”

“No. Alas I am not.” explained the man who was once an earnest young member of the Parliament. “I’m the first Liberal Prime Minister since you were voted out of office. I am now 70 and it is 2052.”

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