The Next Three Word Slogan

A Fictional Tale

About Fictional Aliens masquerading as Human Beings


The scene; A despondent meeting in the Prime Minister’s Office.

tony abbott, “This Senate is so hard to control. They all have minds of their own and I can’t get stuff through. It makes me look weak.”

Peta Credlin, “Well, your popularity is so far down the tubes you cannot call a double dissolution. Rupert doesn’t have everything he wants yet so you cannot give the Government benches away. He will not like it!”

“Well what can I do” asks a querulous tony. “OH Wait! There has been a plane crash involving Australians. Surely we can use that somehow.

“True.” says Peta. “I remember a time when John Howard was way down in the polls and he found an international incident to cling onto and it helped raise him up in the polls.”

“That’s right!” cries abbott. “9/11. It worked for him. He found a scapegoat and things went really well for him.”

“Don’t forget the Russians are right next door and Putin is coming here for the G20 meeting.” Peta contributes.

“That’s right,” crows tony. I can start blaming the Russians now and Rupert’s  media will raise a huge hatred of them here in Australia. It doesn’t matter what he does overseas. Then I can ban Putin and any other Russians from coming here. That will win us the support of a majority of Australians.”

“Hmmmm,” Peta thoughtfully says. “There is not a lot of evidence that this has anything to do with the Russians. It seems the separatists got hold of this missile system when they overran one of the Ukrainian bases. It wasn’t supplied by the Russians. Some Eastern separatist fool decided to fire at will and ask questions later.”

“We don’t need to worry about complicated stuff like that even if it is true. We cannot make that into a three word slogan, no matter how hard we try. “Russians did it” is much more suited to convincing those dodos who vote for us. And it fits into Rupert’s headlines so well.”

“OK.” says Peta. So now we whip up anti-Russian feeling for about three weeks. Then we ban Putin from entering Australia. Then we can do the Double Dissolution thing and get proper control of an open and adult Parliament.”

“Yes!” concludes tony. “It worked for John Howard, it’ll work for me.”

At least, I hope it is a fiction.


5 responses to “The Next Three Word Slogan

  1. Premonitionary Aerchie! We’re about to see TOUGH TONY ABBOTT I suspect. BIG BOLD STATEMENTS, TOUGH TALKING TONY, ABBOTT THRASHES PUTIN, RUSSKIS GO HOME, ABBOT BANS PUTIN! The three word slogan possibilities are endless!!


  2. Russian Trade Minister currently here, Putin due later in the year,… Joyce ‘n Robb want to flog beef, lamb, wheat and would love Putin to sign up – after the Abbott anger and political posturing subsides, unless the Coalition strategists think there is more advantage in a David vs Evil Bully, anti Putin campaign,… Oz will quietly be back open for business with Russia


    • Exactly! This is all a posturing act for the gullible Jones-Bolt knuckledraggers! – Yes I have a double dose of angry – angry at what happened and angry at the short term advantage the occupant of the PM’s seat is cynically taking of a human tragedy.


  3. Strange that he is showing such justifiable concern with this tragedy (essential) yet shows complete unjustifiable lack of concern for Christmas Island/Nauru/Manus detainees and Tamils that have already been returned to Sri Lanka and those imprisoned on a boat somewhere at sea. Strange that there is a lack of concern for a murdered young asylum seeker on Manus and the fact that the murderer is still free. Caring Tony? Not likely!


    • It is ALL about the polls. There are no votes in being nice to refugees. There are lots of votes in being a big-note anti Russian (they must be bad, they were COMMUNISTS!) loud mouth because they may have killed OUR people. Stuff annoying rubbish like proof. That won’t win votes! GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR


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