Helium was up.
Feathers were down.
Paper was stationary.
Fluorescent tubing was dimmed in light trading.
Knives were up sharply.
Cows steered into a bull market.
Pencils lost a few points.
Hiking equipment was trailing.
Elevators rose, while escalators continued their slow decline.
Weights were up in heavy trading.
Light switches were off.
Mining equipment hit rock bottom.
Diapers remained unchanged.
Shipping lines stayed at an even keel.
The market for raisins dried up.
Coca Cola fizzled.
Ærchies Archive - Digital Detritus 
Why don’t you stick a few more puns in there, just for fun?
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-=CRASH!=-
(if that’s not /too/ topical)
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Is the bill currentl’y before the US Senate really called The Wall’s Treat?
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No, it’s called the Big Bailout. Hope it works, since we are mortgaging our future and our children’s futures and our grandchildren’s. Jayzus. I’m so glad my house is paid for.
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See the Monty Python money show sketch for truly hilarious financial follies.
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yes very amusing but you have to get out more often…
and i take it you don’t have a lover
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